Who’s the Boss?
As an engineer, I learned many important formulas;
F = ma tau = F/A k.e. = ½ m.v.2
W = m.g. A = π • r2
But for life, I have discovered a much more valuable formula.
E + R = O
Where E is the Events of our life. R is our Response to those events. O is the Outcome of E + R.
Now E, the events of our life, is out of our control. We cannot prevent the drunken driver from crossing the median into our lane of traffic. We cannot prevent the government’s actions from sinking us into a recession.
But we do have our control over R, our Response to those events. If we are driving defensively, instead of texting on our phone, we have already detected the erratic driving of the car approaching us, and have started taking corrective measures. Our Response to the Event, will determine the Outcome.
Sometimes our R needs to be reactive, rather than proactive, as in avoiding an accident.
For example, say a very close friend, or relative, has wronged you. Anyone could see they were at fault, not you. But it has put a serious, perhaps terminal, strain upon your relationship. Rather than leave it up to them, while you sit steaming, pouting, and suffering from the lost friendship, you should take the higher ground. Swallow your pride, go to that person, and apologize for anything you might have done. I did this myself with a close relationship. Although I was wronged, I went to the person, someone very close, and told them I was sorry that I let a financial failure stand in the way of me being the person they deserved to have as a friend.
I TOOK CONTROL!
Now the person can either take the apology, and the relationship can continue, or they can decline, but leave you knowing that you did all you could.
Either way, you win.